just us.

thankful

Today, I celebrate being a parental unit to this one:

...and 6 years of marriage to this one:

But rather than spend the day with them, I was doing this instead:

That's life, go figure.

getting past that point

I started working out in January, and I'm still going at it.  Kinda surprised though, since I tend to get really into things and then poop out.  But I think I'm at that point where if I don't go, I feel bad.  And keep thinking to myself that I should've gone.

Every Tuesday (and Thursdays when I'm off), I go to a Cardio, Core and More class.  And it pretty much does those things.  The teacher is pretty intimidating, but very motivating at the same time.  I used to fear going to her class, yet I still wanted to go.  Now, I look forward to it every week.

I'm one of those students that stands in the back of the class, away from all the regulars and hard-core fitness people.  There's no way I can keep up with them, and I figured if I stand in the back, the teacher won't see me and I can go at my own pace, i.e. give up when I think I've had enough.

I'm starting to migrate towards the front nowadays, not because I want to check myself out in the mirror, but because I feel like I am challenged when I'm there.  I'm closer to the hard-core people, therefore I feel like I'm working harder.  But I still hit that point, and I wanna stop.  And I do.

But lately, I've been trying to push myself past that mental stop point and to keep going and going.  It's not always easy and I feel myself slow down and sometimes I just stop and give up.  But I know if I want to get the results I'm looking for, I've got to push through.

Today was sort of a small hooray for me.  The teacher pointed me out, and recognized me for the hard work I've been putting in.  I'm by no means in super good shape, but I've certainly come a long way.  I know they say that you should be doing it for yourself, and not necessarily for the praise of others, but sometimes it's nice to be recognize for something you do.  

I'm glad I've kept up with the workouts, and surprised I haven't given up.  I'm not doing this to lose weight because the scale tells me I haven't.  But I'm doing it more for personal health and well-being.  And because I've been paying for a darn gym membership for 9 years and never used it!!

breaking the silence

So it's been over 2 months since my last post. Shame on me. I had every intention of getting back on here but frankly, never did it. What is one to do? I was going through a bunch of posts in the months leading up to February 2009, when Keira was born. I actually started tearing up as I read the life Mike and I lived prior to becoming parents. There were lots of dinners out, theater movies, carefree outings, and tv watching. We didn't have to worry about anyone but ourselves, although the weeks leading up to Keira's birth I worried a lot about my water breaking. But now, we are a family of three. Dinners out still happen, but now we choose kid-friendly places. We have yet to bring Keira to see a movie in a theater but she has no problem sitting still for one at home. TV time is catered more the the 4 year old, but thank goodness we own more than one television. The last 4 years have come and gone and we are still going strong. When Keira was an infant, I used to be in awe that she was ours, that we were taking care of another life. When she turned one, Mike and I couldn't believe we had survived the first year. She's four now and still growing. Reading all those posts also made me realize that I missed being pregnant. I missed watching the belly grow, feeling the baby's movement, the anticipation of when and what we were having. I felt a little sad. A part of me wanted to be there again. It's been about 4 months since my surgery and getting closer to when we can start trying for another. Aside from a few things, I can't wait until we can have another. IF we can have another. Going into my surgery I always kept in the back of my mind the possibility that Keira may be our one and only. Now don't get me wrong. I want another, I hope to have another, but another may not be in the cards. And I had to mentally prepare myself for that. In the months after, I honestly started to feel a little more at ease with the thought of there not being another addition to our family. Keira is at a more self-sufficient age, and Mike and I both love that. We don't have to hang on her every breath as much, and she can sort of look out for herself. Shoot, she can pee and poop and feed herself, what more do we need? And I told Mike on a few occasions if Keira was our only child, I would be okay with that. Really, I would. And I think he would be too. So we'll see where we go from here. Either another baby will happen or it won't, but either way we have been blessed with an amazing child, and one we would never trade in for anyone else. Unless you catch me on a day where she isn't so amazing, then there will be a 4 year old looking for a new home :) Only time will tell.

I did it

When the new year rolled around, I decided, for myself, that I would hit the gym once a week.  Not 3 times, not everyday, but simply once a week.

So far, so good.

My coworker thought I was shooting a little low and should aim from twice a week, but for some reason I knew that would be "more pressure" for me to meet.  So I just kept it at once a week.  If I could do that, then I would be happy.  Heck, I've been paying for a membership for...gulp...almost 10 years and have probably used it less than 10 times.  24 Hour Fitness just got a nice chunk of my money for nothing.

Last week, I walked on the treadmill for about 45 minutes.  While I did pump up the speed, I didn't increase the incline and ended up not really breaking a sweat.  It probably wasn't much of a workout for most people, but for me it was a good start.  At least I went, right?

I checked out the schedule and found out there was a step class at 9am.  Perfect.  I can drop Keira off at school and head straight to the gym.  It's been quite some time (probably more than 10 years) since I've done step, so I knew I'd be pretty uncoordinated and completely lost.  But I have to start somewhere right?

I stepped on the eliptical for about 10 minutes to get my heart going and then waited outside the classroom with a bunch of other people.  No joke, but I thought I was going to a class for senior citizens.  Every single person standing in front of me had to have been at least 50 years old, and then there was me.  But I told myself, even if it is, I'm still going.  That's what I was standing there for.

So, as one class cleared out and another one filed in, I found my spot off to the side of the teacher.  I could still see, but I didn't want to be in the way of other seasoned steppers.  And then class started...

For the most part, I kept moving.  I recognized some of the moves and was completely lost on others, but I kept moving.  I think I looked at the clock a handful of times, but the first time it was about 24 minutes into the class.  What the heck?  I made it 24 minutes and wasn't in desperation?!  I managed to finish up the remaining 36 minutes, still somewhat lost but sweating nonetheless.  

I'm giving myself a small pat on the back for making it through.  I was watching one class goer throughout the class and passed by her on the way out of the bathroom.  I thanked her for letting me watch her and her movements, because it had been so long since I've gone.  She reassured me that she was once in my same position but I'll eventually get there.

Will I be going again next week?  Hopefully yes.  I can't think of any good excuses not to.

around here

went out for a walk with my co-worker/friend/neighbor Tiffany this morning.  Just what I needed to get away from the computer and out of the house for a bit.  It's pretty chilly here in Southern California, but I just love a sky with not a single cloud in it.

The in-house Rapunzel is back.  This time her hair is super long.

Day 11 photo challenge: water.

Dinner from Tuesday night: potatoes, sausage, pine nuts, mozzarella and pesto pizza.  I never thought about putting potatoes on a pizza and was sort of hoping they would be crispy, but they were soft and surprisingly good.  The pine nuts on top were good too.  I think I may make another one of these for dinner tonight...if I don't get too lazy and want to just eat sushi :)

our slightly out-of-control shoe collection in the garage.  It really doesn't take long for it to get like this.

Monday marked my first day back to work after 7 weeks off.  It was a busy day, and I was afraid I wasn't going to make it, but I did.  I'm going to have to build up my 12-hour shift stamina, but it was nice to be productive again.  And the paycheck that results from it doesn't hurt either.

photo a day challenge

I've seen quite a few people taking part in Fat Mum Slim's January Photo-A-Day Challenge.  And I've decided I'm going to jump on the wagon and join in.

The prompt for days 1 and 2 were "today" and "something new".  I took pictures for these prompts without really knowing it and before I decided to do the challenge.  Day 1 involved us going out for a New Year's day walk and day 2 showed Mike and Keira wearing their new threads.

Day 3: Heart

Keira's attempt at a heart with her fingers, and mine against the sky at dusk.

Day 4: The view from here

sitting beneath a jellyfish canopy on the Jumping Jellyfish ride at Disney's California Adventure and at one end of Main Street at Disneyland.

I'll be adding my photos to my 2013 Project Life.  And I'm super excited that I was able to re-teach myself how to resize and crop photos, then paste them to a new canvas in PhotoShop Elements.  Now I can save myself some paper and ink!!

a new start

yesterday, to commerate Keira's first day back to school and Mike's first day of work for the year, they both wore something new.  Keira had a new dress and shoes, while Mike had on a pair of awesome socks.  I thought it was a nice way to get things started right.

I was thinking about what sort of hopes or goals I wanted for this year, and a few came to mind.

1. Practice patience. This is kind of a big one for me (and maybe for Mike too), especially when it comes to being a parent.  Keira is in the phase of being really challenging right now, and it seems like not a day goes by that one or both of us is yelling at her.  I think my issue is that I expect her to get something done the second I tell her to, but in the toddler world, urgency doesn't usually translate well.  I'd really like to work on this, not only with Keira but in other parts of my life, like at work.

2. Get active (and healthier). Mike and I were both trying to get into this one over the last several months, and while he lasted longer than I did, we both fell off the wagon at the end.  Now that I'm pretty much healed from surgery and Mike's hockey season is set to start up again, I think there isn't much room for excuses as to why we can't do this.  On January 1st, we woke up first thing and all three of us went for a long walk and some playground time.  My brother introduced me to these 10-minute, non-stop workout sessions of any 3 exercises (jumping jacks, lunges, squats, sit-ups, push-ups, etc) that doesn't seem like very much, but at the end gets your heart pumping.  And not to mention results in sore muscles too!  I've done it for 2 days already, so I'm hoping Mike and I can make a habit out of it.

For now, I really want to make these two things a bigger part of my life.  I'm sure I could have a laundry list of resolutions but I'm trying to be realistic about what I can actually accomplish.  We'll see how it all goes...

the first day of 2013

New Year's Eve 2012

the last day of 2012:

good morning

the last of the cheesebread from Virginia Bakery in Berkeley

home from his last day of work

her last lunch: spaghetti

the last garbage pick-up

nap time

our houseguests

a friendly game of ping pong

We went to a friends' house for New Year's Eve and all three of us managed to stay up until midnight.  Keira had a tiny meltdown shortly before midnight, but I was able to diffuse it enough that we could properly ring in the new year.

our gracious hosts, Sofia and Phi

dinner of Phiovanni shrimp, Vietnamese baked salmon and vermicelli

Jonah and Keira having milk and watching Special Agent Oso

a special NYE princess parade

a HUGE breakthrough for Keira...she got up close and even pet a dog!  Bailey is so mellow, Keira wasn't scared at all.

For the past few years, since we've had Keira, I've taken a picture of us both at the end of one year and beginning of the next.  This year was more of the same.

taken on 12/31/12 at 11:57pm 

Happy New Year!!  taken 1/1/13 at 12:02am

family and holidays

I decided to take full advantage of being on leave during the holidays, so Keira and I, along with my mom who was already with us, headed up to the Bay Area for a week.  The weather wasn't the best (i.e. cold and rainy) and Keira was sick with a runny nose and cough, but we still managed to spend time with family while we were there.

We did a lot of hanging out at home, tv watching, playing and eating:

  

I managed to get out and have dinner with two of my college roommates, Fiona and Sarah.  Sarah, who I roomed with for 3 years, is expecting her first baby (a girl!) in February.  Maybe our two littles will share the same birthday!

Before picking up Mike from the airport, my brother, Keira and I went to Bay Street in Emeryville to walk around.  There was the coolest Christmas tree made out of shopping carts on display too!

My cousin Jason and his fiancee Donna hosted the Ko family Christmas this year and while everyone was packed in, we had a fun time.  We had a White Elephant gift exchange as well as gifts for the kids.  And the food?  There was tons of it.  It was nonstop eating from the time we entered until the time we left.

We headed back to So Cal on Sunday, and the rain followed us for the first half of the trip.  By the time we made it to So Cal, there was a bit of sun to greet us.  Mike was only up north for 3 days and he was tired of the rain.

I bought myself a Christmas present back in October and it arrived just in time...on Christmas Eve.  The website itself is not up and running until sometime in January, but I plan on adding to my rings if and when the time comes :)

We headed to Mike's sister's house for Christmas Eve, and had all the Lieu grandkids in one place.  There was more eating and a somewhat chaotic gift opening session too.

We spent Christmas Day at home, starting off with breakfast put together by my brother and I and then Keira opening more gifts from Santa.  Mike and I had lunch with some friends later on and then dinner with my parents and Ryan and Julie.  A pretty lowkey day.

I've been really blessed to have all this time off during the holidays, and I know it probably won't happen again.  I'm starting to get myself mentally ready to return to work after the new year and I think a small part of me is ready to go.  Being home is nice and I wouldn't trade it in for anything, but I know I'm needed at work and I need to bring home a real paycheck again!I